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Posts Tagged Steve Lang

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

January 19th, 2017

Abundant reader feedback

By STEVE LANG

“Unless a reviewer has the courage to give you unqualified praise, I say ignore the bastard.” – John Steinbeck

“If you can’t annoy somebody, there’s little point in writing.” – Kingsley Amis

A writer without readers is like a traveler without a destination, or some such seemingly poignant observation that reads well hot …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

January 12th, 2017

Winter destinations and accompanying logic

By STEVE LANG

“Lately it occurs to me what a long, strange trip it’s been.” – Grateful Dead (Jerry Garcia, Bob Weir, Phil Lesh, Robert Hunter)

When is it appropriate to crank the Grateful Dead’s “Truckin’” to full volume?

According to Balgaard, at 2:30 a.m. on a non-stop jaunt from Minnesota to Colorado to …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

December 15th, 2016

Bringing it all back home

By STEVE LANG

“A young man /from a small town/ with a very large imagination.” – John Prine

John Klingemann’s achievements sum up the high aspirations many parents have for their children.

I, on the other hand, may best exemplify one of Jimmy Buffett’s songs, as one of “the people our parents warned us …

Turkey trots, pizza crawls, and airport cots

Turkey trots, pizza crawls, and airport cots

December 8th, 2016

By STEVE LANG

“People say there’s delays on flights. Delays, really? New York to California in five hours, that used to take 30 years, a bunch of people used to die on the way there, have a baby, you would end up with a whole different group of people by the time you got there. Now …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

November 23rd, 2016

Conversations with countrymen

By STEVE LANG

“Travel makes all men countrymen, makes people noblemen and kings, every man tasting of liberty and dominion.” – Amos Bronson Alcott

“Just a little lefse will go a long way.” – Doug Setterberg

Four Norwegians walked into a brewery . . . and after meeting this Swede, probably wondered if this was some …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

November 17th, 2016

Talking turkey in various and altered states

By STEVE LANG

“Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.” – Johnny Carson

“If you want to save a species, simply decide to eat it. Then it …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

November 3rd, 2016

Hunting’s priceless experiences

By STEVE LANG

“You might be a redneck if your taxidermy bill exceeds your annual income.” – Jeff Foxworthy

“How can a man who can hit a deer at 250 yards keep missing the toilet?” Anonymous

I have learned, after more than a half-century in the field, that the cheapest component of hunting is ammunition.

Steve …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

October 27th, 2016

Savoring the joys of arrested development

By STEVE LANG

“I smile because you are my sister, I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it.” – Anonymous

As my sister was leaving the plane in Midland last week, the attendant noticed her pink hair and asked, “Is this because of breast cancer awareness?”

(selfie by STEVE …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

October 13th, 2016

A Shakespearean guide to Big Bend living

By STEVE LANG

“I like this place and could willingly waste my time in it.” – “As You Like It,” by William Shakespeare

“Never judge someone until you have walked a mile in his boots. That way, he will be barefoot and you will have a one-mile lead.” – a West …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

October 6th, 2016

Even if you’re reading this, thank a teacher

By STEVE LANG

“It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.” – Albert Einstein

“I never did very well in math – I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn’t meant my answers literally.” – Calvin Trillin

Every time I …

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