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steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

February 5th, 2015

Avoiding the ravages of good health

By STEVE LANG

“I’m awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.” – Anonymous

In order to eliminate any misconceptions that I take myself too seriously, consider the ornery Alaskan who consistently hurled rocks at a particular bird:

He left no tern unstoned.

Nothing significant here, but I do enjoy a …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

January 29th, 2015

Little Steve Lang

Haircut reluctance may have averted hair-raising experiences

By STEVE LANG

“It was then he lost his head/not to mention an arm or two before he stopped…” – From “30,000 Pounds of Bananas,” by Harry Chapin.

Like my buddy Sven, things we did not possess at a moment of decision may have prevented future …

the idle american

the idle american

January 29th, 2015

Tom Day

America for me

By Dr. DON NEWBURY

Upon exiting movies recently – Unbroken, then American Sniper – I thought of this sobering quote. May God be thanked for others’ shoulders on which we stand in a world where too many choose to hunker down.

“One nation under God” and other patriotic thoughts flooded. Immediately …

cattleman’s column

cattleman’s column

January 29th, 2015

National Beef Checkoff, a successful grassroots program

 By RICHARD THORPE III

First Vice President

Texas and Southwestern Cattle Raisers Association

In 1985, the United States Congress passed the Farm Bill, which in-turn created the Beef Promotion and Research Act. Creation of this Act gave American beef producers the ability to create a mandatory “National Beef Checkoff” program if they …

high desert sketches

high desert sketches

January 22nd, 2015

VALERIE HOWARD image

Je Suis Charlie, they will never kill all of the Crusader Rabbits

By GEORGE A. COVINGTON

Irony is often the fuel that powers satire. I found it extremely ironic that my last column Crusader Rabbit, My Hero for all Seasons, was written four days before the massacre of a dozen satirical writers …

the idle american

the idle american

January 22nd, 2015

My Uncle Mort’s New Year…

By Dr. DON NEWBURY

From time to time, readers send email or call to pose similar questions: “Is your Uncle Mort real?” My unvarying rhetorical response is: “Do you want him to be?”

I sense their sinking feelings, let down by my failure to provide positive answers. I grudgingly admit that he is …

How not to run an endurance race

How not to run an endurance race

January 22nd, 2015

“I started to get huge amounts of physical pain and psychological pain realizing I had 32 miles to go,” said Jeff Matheis, in his running gear.

By SASHA von OLDERSHAUSEN

For most, running an ultra-marathon requires months of training and hundreds of hours of conditioning to build up the endurance to accomplish such a feat. …

the road to excellence

the road to excellence

January 15th, 2015

Volunteers Who Care about Our Kids

By ANDREW PETERS

Each January, we pause to express our appreciation for a very special group of volunteers: the school board members.

Usually, we don’t think of school board members as school volunteers, but they do in fact volunteer to serve. School board members give their time, energy, and counsel to the …

steve’s funny column

steve’s funny column

January 15th, 2015

Meeting the Messerschmidts

By STEVE LANG

“I laugh because I must not cry. That is all. That is all.” – Abraham Lincoln

For the past month, I have mourned the death of my wife, Clarissa Annette Kaiser.

My heartfelt thanks for the support and consolation from countless friends, family members, co-workers and acquaintances. The phone calls, cards, emails, Facebook …

the idle american

the idle american

January 15th, 2015

Wash Day Blues on Black List

By Dr. DON NEWBURY

I would never knowingly trivialize, minimize or in any manner denigrate the “trying times” Thomas Paine wrote about in 1776. Americans understandably felt very much on trial.

Our nation was wobbly at best, what with King George and his fellow Brits thinking ill of us. Symbolically, they were …

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